One Night in Hell

30 August 2009 - My first day of school.
7:11am - Still on blogger. Eyes wide opened.
Am I tired? Yes.
Do I wish to get a good sleep now? Hell yeah.
Then why aren't I sleeping? Hahahahaha
What am I doing? I don't know.
How could this happen to me? I can't tell
How was last night? Had been awake for the whole DAMN night
So how am I feeling now? Totally terrible. Need you ask?
What am I going to do? Sitting like a fool and counting down the clock.

Thanks for giving me such a wonderful day. Appreciate it.

Thankiu =D

I have an announcement to make. Me and my girl have finally made up. We're fine now. Thanks for all the advices. Thanks for being so concerned. It's so kind of u guys. Really appreciate it. Words just cannot express my gratitude. Again, a million thanks to all my friends and also my family. And a big thanks to my girl for forgiving an evil guy like me. I love her more than I can say.

Help

Tell me what can I do to bring her back? I can do everything, as long as she comes back to me. I am ready to give up whatever it takes. Somebody please tell me. Please.

Unforgivable

Guys, remember when was the last time you cried?

I've always been a happy man and cry never seems to have its toll on me. But last night, I broke down and cried before my girl. I did something wrong. Real wrong. I know I have never looked so weak, especially when I'm with her. I even felt guilty when I asked for forgiveness. To be frank. if the same thing happened to me, I know I would never forgive her. Who am I to ask for forgiveness? I am not even worth a second chance. But I really can't let her go. And I know my tears will never bring her back. I don't blame her, it's my fault, I can't change the playful nature in me I can never change. I am not afraid to admit that, yes, my heart has broken into pieces, it's like losing someone special and important. It's like sending someone you love and care away. Our love died. Things didn't go quite the way I want them to go, I know I have never loved someone so deeply. But why'd we have to hurt the one we love the most? Why is this happening to me?

So it's not a good thing to remain happy all the time. The happier you are, the more vulnerable you will be when you ever get hit. Trust me. I've never felt so weak. If only I could turn back time, if only I could. I miss her like crazy.

Rainy Days

Uh my weekends have been ruined by rainy days. When can I see sunshine again? I miss warm sandy beaches like hell. I even checked the weather forecast for weather in Singapore and it's gonna be raining for the entire week.

Anyway, this weekend of mine is catastrophic. I just got my hair dyed, and what could I say? It's the worst hairdo ever. Damn it! And I have yet to get my IPhone because priority is given to those who sign up Maxis contract. Uh business strategy. I understand that.

Waiting for Mr Sun to show his happy face again. Waiting for my gal to come. She's on her way. =)

Promises

Promises are meant to be broken, aren't they? People make promises because they are unconfident of themselves. People want promises because they are afraid. I owe my apologies to my girl. I can still remember how many promises I have given to her and how many promises I have broken too.

To her disappointment, she once asked me to stop giving her empty promises. I failed to keep my promises and I lost my trustworthiness anymore. In fact, I am pretty agreeable with what she says, "Never make promises that you can never keep." Therefore, is love all about promises? I doubt. What is the meaning of promises? Is it something to make the relationship last? Is it powerful enough to keep two hearts together? When promises have lost their meaning between two lovers, then it's time for them to ponder - what is lack in the relationship? In my opinion, "trust" is the keyword.

If you trust someone, you wouldn't ask for promises. If you believe you can keep a promise, prove it instead of making promises. I have learnt through my lessons, and now it's time for me to learn how to gain my trustworthiness again. I always bear this in mind - Promises don't come easy.

Finally

Finally I have made the first move by writing my very first blog here. Have always wanted to own a blog but when I think of the time I need to commit to this blog, it's scaring me. Lolz. Anyways, I would start my blog by announcing the death of my handphone. My Nokia N95 has been with me for more than a year, can't tell the exact period though. It's been certified dead today at 10pm, it ended its services without saying goodbye but does this mean that I am not too far from getting the newest IPhone 3GS that I have always dreamt of? Hopefully yes. Lolz.

Anyways, I will try my best to bring my handphone back to life. We share some special bond of brotherhood. Lolz. School's gonna reopen soon. Mixed feelings. But definitely happiness overcomes sadness. Life in Singapore is more happening and eventful. Whereas back in Penang, all my friends are always nowhere to be found, as I am the ONLY one who is having my sem break. Glad that Pov had passed his exams so JAMPS will be reunited again, Lolz. Looking forward to seeing you guys again. Another good news that adds to the thrill, it's good to hear that my girl is coming over to Penang next week, all the way from Kuala Lumpur, I consider it a happy ending for my holidays.

Tomorrow is a deciding day for my dad's company. A very critical moment. There's nothing in this world could put him to sleep tonight. Anyways I wish him luck and all the best.

I am going to bed soon. My first blog post is boring as expected. I know. Lolz. Good night world.